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Thursday, June 24

a summary of my love life

Everyone will have their own idea of perfect guy/girl. Maybe the guy must be tall, good looking, funny...and the girl must have beautiful eyes, fair skin and understanding...different people have different type of dream guy or girl. I too have my own idea of a dream guy..he must have good sense of humour, extremely romantic, neither too dark nor fair etc...but then i learned that Allah SWT will give us not the soulmate that we desire, but what we need to complete each other.

I am a hopeless romantic and I realize that I could do unthinkable romantic stuff when I'm in love. Either in words or the way I act. I have been told that I have ways that able to make guy's heart melt easily. I dont know what I did but it just comes naturally. One of my talent, I guess? ^_^

FYI, I have been involve with quite a number of relationships. With different type of guys with different way of thinking and ways they do stuff. Although I've been through several relationships, I just dont feel that I'm in love, I mean really2 in love. In other words, i do not fall in love easily. Of course, I would show the love for the opposite sex, but it is actually not the one that I was hoping it would be. No, I dont feel like I toyed with their or MY feelings, but it is just my way to convince myself that my love is real or to train myself to love them unconditionally. But it always turn out that I will try to love them under certain conditions. I feel ashamed of myself when once I love a guy out of pity..I will not elaborate on that.

Maybe I should stop looking for romantic love that I want and need and just accepting the love that I need.

p/s: suddenly thought of my love life and have to write this down...

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